Dear Best Friend

I actually wanted to write a post about why you are my best friend. But, i am not going to do that because you already know why you are my best friend. If you don't know we wouldn't have remained friends all these years. Ten years? or more? I actually have no concept of time whatsoever. Because that's the type of person I am. But you remember things like this when it comes to me. Thank you for knowing that. Thank you for knowing all the things that i don't.

You will always be the one who understood, who cared, who stayed. You will always be the words I never had to say - that no matter where we go, or how far apart, we would always be there for each other. Thank you for always being closest to me even when we were in separate zones and separate stages of life. Thank you for not letting us get split by dumb facts like distance or time. Thank you for never giving up on our friendship and for never being like "yeah, things change, people change". We all get distant to a certain degree when we make huge transitions in life. But you didn't let me get very far because u knew what was really important.

You will always be the voice on the other line of telephone, the comfort of what i didn't know i needed to hear. You will always be the encouragement and praise. You will always be the remainder of love i deserve and the strength i needed. You will always be the one who treated me nothing short of your family member - a bond so unbreakable that i learned, with you, the true meaning of Friendship. 

Thank you for taking care of me in every way possible, for being there when no one else was and when you even didn't have to be. Everyone has those friends who are close but not really; but you are not one of those. You never got mad when i didn't call you for weeks on because I was too busy being someone's wife and someone's mother. But you were right there and are for everything , no explanations needed.

Thank you for believing in me and not judging me. Thank you for doing all those things a real best friend does; for letting me sob into your shoulder when I need to. I know you will always be the eyes that were patient enough, staring into mine when i spoke and wiped my tears away. Thank you for always knowing who I am and reminding me of that when I forget. Thank you for genuinely concerned with the outcome of my life and always listening even when you are tired with your own life.

I can give my heart away to someone else. I can slip in and out of many other friendships, but one truth that remains is - No matter where this life takes us, you've been the one constant. And you will always have my heart, best friend. 

And I can never thank God enough for you.

Love always,
Your Best Friend.

Harsh Truth

There comes a time when you sometimes have to accept that someone you really want is not the one for you. It's sad and heartbreaking but also a harsh truth that many of us have to face. This is me accepting that reality.

This is me accepting that reality that you will never be mine. Ever. Not now. Not in future. Your road is not paved to go the same way as mine. And while so badly i want to convince that it is, I think somewhere deep down inside of me I always knew. It just means that you were not meant to be the main character in my story.  While what I want is to wake up next to you wrapped in your arms, it's never going to happen.

I always wonder if it would have been better if we never had met. May be my cute little world that i had built all these years would have remained fully intact. Instead, your storm came through and crashed into me so fast and so hard that i will never be the one same after. You are never going to be the one to keep my heart safe.

It will break my heart to know that you will never be the person I spend lazy weekends with. You will never be the one I look over at when we are in our 70's and think 'yeah i love you more now'. You won't be the person because we were never meant to be, even though we try.

This is me accepting that this is just not our destiny. Our souls are not meant to intertwine. Our hearts will never beat as one. And we will never be a real thing!

And even though i am accepting that there will never be an us, it doesn't mean that i don't love you. It doesn't mean that i won't carry you with me forever. Because it just doesn't work like that. You can accept that someone is not your forever but still know that they have affected you so deeply that it's hard not to take pieces of them with you.

There are many things i hope for you. That the person you give your heart to will love you as much as i do. That you follow your dreams and don't give up when it gets hard. That you find your inner strength and know that you are completely enough. I wish you get each and everything that makes your heart feel full.

So, this is me accepting that you will never be mine no matter how much it hurts to move on. This is me knowing that your future is bright but so is mine. And they are not one in the same, I'll never forget you.

Remembering Him

The day when she met him, she saw herself in the mirror.

Her reflection was completely a different woman

Her eyes were twinkling, re-living the moments

She touched her lips gently with her fingers, remembering his lips on hers

Her hand caressed her neck, feeling his kisses

Stroking her hair, she remembered how he embraced her

She leaned her head back as if she was imagining the moments of passion they shared

He may not be physically there at the moment, but she remembers the mark he leaves on her.